Jehovah's coming in produced Issac

Recently started a bible study challenge from the beginning of Old Testament- Genesis.

Start from chapter 12, it becomes obvious that God had a calling to Abram, and Abram set up an altar and worshipped God.

Recently I'm really bothered by the matter of God's calling. It is due to my difficult environment, and I've been disappointed several times. I don't know the Lord's clear leading, or more precisely, I become less confident what the Lord wish to lead me. Yesterday, another scholarship has been rejected. I cried and prayed. It has been a long process to me to try to acquire a funding, and my stress level has increased. The stress is so subtle that I only realised that it affected my digestion system and has been causing some little problems within me. On the one hand, I have tried my best but I really don't know where is the open door. On the other hand, I want to give up and just discontinue my study although I have been believing that it was the Lord's leading for me to come to the UK.


I've been disappointed again, again, and again.

I want to know what is God's calling, and how it can relate my experience? Several points I enjoy from the Genesis life-study chapter 37.

1. God's calling indicates a new beginning. It's a change of race and also a change of life by faith. 
Almost no doubt that, we are all called by the Lord on the day we believe. It is a change from Adamic race to Abrahamic race. A change from a fallen race to a race of faith. Such a change is good, but we cannot remain there. In addition to the racial change, we have to experience the change of life.

2. God's timing is after Abraham's circumcision. 
This also has been bothering me a lot. If my coming to the UK is according to the will of God, He shall open the way, and recently I just don't see any fruits that come from my effort. Life-study made a point here- God is the One who gives promises and He will also do it. God gave a promise that Abraham shall gain an heir. When Abraham heard this, he thought God meant Eliezer, and Sarah even thought to "help" Abraham by Hagar's fertility. In the end, none of them pleased God. God brought in Issac at the time of life- after Abraham's circumcision. This circumcision is significant for Abraham because his fleshly effort was dealt with.

Although I still don't know much how I can experience the Lord's promises realised in my case at the time of life, this portion has been quite enjoyable to me today.