Do not cast away therefore your boldness

I don't mean to be negative- but there have been so many things that frustrate me.

Not only am I under a lot of pressure (housing, work, and so on) but also my companies and I have been praying for the Lord to open a way for us for a long time but nothing happens.

I remember that one day I was just totally falling apart. Too many things that I was trying to sort out did not work and at the same time, the Lord did not open the way as we prayed. I was just so exhausted, so fed up with everything, and not knowing what to do. I just cried and cried a lot. It seemed that my mental capacity had reached the peak that I couldn't even think. Even if I tried to pray, I could not. I didn't know how to pray about the situation. I was just crying out to Him and tell Him that "I really cannot take this anymore, Lord, save me". Well, my wording was far more desperate. I was so desperate to a point that I would rather give up my life just to go through that situation.

I still don't know how the Lord will arrange for me, but I am really tired. Several times this week, I feel that I will not be able to go on in Him unless He shows mercy, and the Lord used the words in Hebrews to encourage me again.


In the morning, the Lord reminded me to run the race (Hebrews chapter 12). As I was listening to the life-study radio programme, brother Lee used a vivid illustration concerning why we should run. Supposed we are driving on a highway, and whenever we slow down, we are looking for exits. As we are looking for exits, we will drive out of the way and will not stay on the highway anymore. Only the Lord is the way. If we don't speed up (run), we start to slow down and look for exits. Eventually, we might leave this unique way, and that is why we should run the way as running the race.

Just now as I was reading Hebrews chapter 10, several verses spoke to my heart.

35. Do not cast away therefore your boldness, which has great reward.
36. For you have need of endurance in order that, having done the will of God, you may obtain the promise.
37. "For in yet a very little while the Coming One will come and will not delay.
38. But My righteous one shall live by faith; and if he shrinks back, My soul does not delight in him."
39. But we are not of those who shrink back to ruin but of them who have faith to the gaining of the soul.

The Lord wants me not to shrink back, but be bold again, to gain the great reward. He promises that in a little while, He will come and will not delay. This echoes my prayer to Him, "Lord, come back soon!"

Hymnal 531
1. Fade, fade each earthly joy;
    Jesus is mine.
    Break every tender tie;
    Jesus is mine.
    Dark is the wilderness,
    Earth has no resting place,
    Jesus alone can bless;
    Jesus is mine.

2. Tempt not my soul away;
    Jesus is mine.
    Here would I ever stay;
    Jesus is mine.
    Perishing things of clay,
    Born but for one brief day,
    Pass from my heart away;
    Jesus is mine.

3. Farewell, ye dreams of night;
    Jesus is mine.
    Lost in this dawning bright;
    Jesus is mine.
    All that my soul has tried
    Left but a dismal void;
    Jesus has satisfied;
    Jesus is mine.

4. Farewell, mortality;
    Jesus is mine.
   Welcome, eternity;
    Jesus is mine.
   Welcome, O Loved and Blest,
   Welcome, sweet scenes of rest,
   Welcome, my Savior’s breast;
   Jesus is mine.

Lord, thank You for the difficulties that You have arranged for me. These exposed what the world is, and also exposed how much I need You. Therefore, I can utter such a genuine prayer. "Lord, come back soon!"